mental-health – might be baloney

In his poem, “Wasteland” T. S. Elliot wrote the opening line: “April is the cruelest month.”

Truth be told all months are cruel when it comes to death by suicide.

On April 16, 2026, former Virginia Lieutenant Governor, Justin Fairfax, after murdering his wife died by suicide.

I can only begin to imagine the trauma for his son and daughter. Both were in the home at the time.

Reports indicate that Mr. Fairfax’s life was in a tailspin. His professional and personal life were a mess. Any attempts to recover from this downward spiral would have required an unyielding commitment and effort from Mr. Fairfax.

Death by suicide is no stranger to my family, neighbors, friends, and co-workers.

In my thirty one years of work in Virginia’s public schools, I saw the impact when students, teachers, and parents died by suicide.

Hearts are forever crushed.

Remaining loved ones always ask— could I have done anything differently to have prevented one of life’s cruelest intrusions?

The United States Center For Disease Control and Prevention reported in 2023, 49,000 people died by suicide. That is one death every eleven minutes.

In Virginia there are fourteen cities with a population range from 41,705 to 49,627. The 2023 deaths by suicide is the equivalent of wiping out one of those cities.

Despite efforts to improve access to mental health care and the creation of the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, we still lose too many people to death by suicide.

The 988 number on a paper towel dispenser in a public restroom (Photo Bill Pike)

Writer Rick Bragg’s book, Somebody Told Me, is comprised of newspaper stories he wrote. The last chapter is titled “Living and Dying.”

In that chapter, the article: On Florida Bridge, Troopers Are Also Suicide Counselors, I read about troopers who encounter people on the Sunshine Skyway Bridge. These individuals are poised to jump off the bridge. Quite simply, they have lost all hope.

With non-threatening compassion and patience, the officers quickly work to establish a rapport with the troubled jumper.

Sometimes, officers find that a simple touch or gentle words of reason change the jumper’s thinking. In those altered seconds, officers are able to help the person to move away from that precarious point on the bridge.

Doesn’t matter if the person is a public figure or a troubled soul on the edge of a bridge, we must work to provide more opportunities to help and assist the hopeless individuals who are pondering death by suicide.

In a country that can build skyscrapers that push skylines upward, propel rockets into the blue yonder, and perform life changing medical operations, we can’t rest until we figure out even more successful interventions to prevent death by suicide.

At this very moment someone’s hopeless heart is ticking toward that eleven minutes mark.

Doesn’t America want to break the cruelty of this heartbreaking cycle?

In Henrico County, sleep might have been non-existent or extremely restless for school system and county government personnel on the evening of December 4. Earlier that day, a student was stabbed at Henrico High School.

Shortly after twelve noon, two students were involved in an isolated confrontation. One student used a knife to attack and stab a fellow student.

Early news reports stated that the wounded student was fighting for his life. Today, Thursday, December 5, local media reported that following surgery the student’s condition had stabilized.

I’m sure that news brought a slight sense of relief to the victim’s family and the personnel who responded to this unacceptable behavior.

As the investigation continues, maybe we will learn the reason for such a vicious attack. What school system and county leaders learn from this severe disruption of the school day might help to prevent similar conflicts in the future.

For 31 years, I served in the public schools of Virginia. As a teacher, assistant principal, and principal, I remember difficult moments when the day went wrong. When the life of the school is disrupted with extreme violence, students, parents, and school personnel can’t push an erase button. That day stays with them.

No matter how much is budgeted toward security systems, resource officers, extensive safety training for personnel, state and federal legislation, and a stringent code of conduct for students, school systems have no immunity from unsafe, violent disruptions of the school environment.

During the course of a school year, our Virginia public schools are required to make reports about student code of conduct violations. I’m not opposed to the reporting of this data. But, I want to know how the Virginia Department of Education and school systems use this data.

For example, can the review of this data be used to help schools reduce severe disruptions in the school day?

What can we learn about the frequency, timing, and location of these disruptions?

How early are we able to track tendencies of non-compliant student behaviors?

What triggers their non-compliance? Is it unsuccessful academic performance? Poor interpersonal skills? Instability at home? Mental/physical health trauma?

What might we lean about the two students involved with the stabbing at Henrico High School by asking similar questions?

Additionally, more probing questions must be directed at public school systems to understand how non-compliant students impact the morale of the school. For example:

How many students do we have in our high schools who should be rising seniors, but who are still considered freshmen because of not earning enough academic credits?

What type of audits are in place to determine if alternative education programs are truly meeting the academic and behavior needs of non-compliant students?

How many faculty and staff members file workmen compensation claims based upon injuries from breaking up dangerous fights or attempting to restrain an out of control student?

How many teachers resign each year from the pressure and stress of attempting to work with difficult students in challenging school environments?

If we have all of this data, and we aren’t using it to ask deeper questions to find ways to reduce disruptive behaviors and to make our school environments safer and more conducive for learning, then why do we continue to value its collection?

In the movie Moneyball, Peter Brand, an evaluator of the skills of baseball players, tells his general manager, Billy Beane, “There is an epidemic failure within the game to understand what is really happening.”

With our public schools in Virginia, I think there is an “epidemic failure” to understand the impact that vicious generational cycles of community neglect have on the daily performance of students who struggle academically, behaviorally, or both.

I will go to my grave wondering why we fail to see how the erosion and instability of our families impacts our schools. If we think our families aren’t in challenging circumstances, then how do we explain the creation of Family Advocate positions in our school systems?

As the investigation of this life threatening stabbing unfolds, we can expect finger pointing. Finger pointing makes for headlines and sound bytes, but rarely does it solve problems.

In our classrooms, data is a part of our instructional curriculum.

To improve our schools, when a school day goes wrong, don’t we owe our students, parents, teachers, and communities a thorough review of each incident including pivotal corresponding data about students and their families?

We know the answer is yes.

If we neglect the study of this information, we can expect more serious student incidents in our schools and less sleep for students, parents, teachers, and communities.

And that is unacceptable.

Tag: mental-health

When All Hope Is Gone: Death By Suicide

When a school day goes wrong